Step 1: It’s Time To See A Therapist

“You never really know when it begins.

You never really remember the first time the feeling of emptiness appeared or the first time you felt the tightness in your chest. You can’t really remember why you began feeling like something was wrong, but it was constantly at the back of your mind.

When did you start sleeping 13 hours a day, only to feel tired all the time? When did you start to run away from these thoughts in your head and hide behind the comfort of food? When did you completely stop caring about yourself? When did you begin to indulge in things you knew were bad for you, but did them anyway? What made you push all your friends away? What made you avoid all their calls, make excuses and disappear from their lives? Why can’t you perform at work the way you used to?

Why doesn’t your life excite you anymore?

For most people, there comes a time when these questions play like a broken record. They begin to weigh you down and slowly, start to take over your life.

Some days, it takes every ounce of will power you can muster to wake up and get out of bed. Sometimes, you can’t bring yourself to shower for a week.

What is left is a shadow of the person you used to be. To an outsider, it might simply look as if you’ve become lazy or as if you’ve lost focus. You, however, know it’s something else – something entirely different. As if something in your brain is controlling you like a puppet on strings, except that it’s swallowing you into an inertia that you can’t seem to escape.

This point may very well be where your life can go two ways. On one hand, you’re probably going to be pulled deeper into the quick sand of the inertia that is ruling your life, or you may continue to let it take the steering wheel, and drive you on the road of self-destruction.

You can, however, take back control of your life. This is the more difficult option of the two – by no stretch of imagination is it easy to enter this boxing ring, let alone win this fight against your demons.

However, as physical therapist Judith Hanson Lasater says, “Which one do you want: the pain of staying where you are, or the pain of growth?”

Booking your first appointment with a therapist can be daunting. Some people put it off for days, months, and even years. The social stigma around seeing a therapist has a major role to play here, but so do your own inhibitions.

“Why do I even need a therapist? There’s nothing wrong with me, I feel fine today.”

“I’m over-reacting, I don’t need help I just need to get my act together.”

You will hear these things from other people, and your own voice begins to resonate this. It’s no wonder then, that for most people, the first step is probably the most difficult one of all. Sometimes, it’s best to just close your eyes and take the plunge.

See A Therapist

For me, it was about turning off the voices of social conditioning and my own irrationality – if only for a moment – to get online and book myself an appointment. It felt like a small victory at the end of it, a feeling I hadn’t experienced in a long time.

It didn’t take long for the floodgates to open themselves, though, and all the anxiety I had managed to shut out for those few moments came back in.

I booked myself an appointment, but was I really going to make it? Even if I did, what was I going to say to this stranger when I couldn’t even bring myself to talk to my best friends? Of course, my greatest fear was that the therapist would tell me that there was nothing wrong with me, and that I was simply an incompetent person.

I was determined, though, to not give into the whims of the puppet master that my brain had become, and did take this first step, for myself. I’d deal with whatever came next, whenever it came.”

– P

Thinking of taking your first step? Make an Appointment here. (Tele-Consult & In-Person)

Interested to learn more? Step 2: What To Expect On Your First Appointment

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Showing 2 comments
  • Monica
    Reply

    Just reading this made me feel I am not the only one feeling this way. Thank you for sharing. Very helpful.

    • Raeesa Bukhary
      Reply

      You’re definitely not alone, Monica. Several people suffer from depression, and there is always hope and help. If you like, we can guide you towards the next step.

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